He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
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I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
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In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
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