yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
