Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
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There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
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Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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