Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize
