Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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