Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize