i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
