Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
