bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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