Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
she peed on how many people?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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