Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.