some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
