I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
