I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
