I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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