Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
