ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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