And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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