JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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