fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
whose ass print is on the piano?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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