a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
