I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just wanna soil my oats bro
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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