i don't like sucking hair
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
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I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
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Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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