therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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