I love black thongs
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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