love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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