Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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