If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
