the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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