i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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