It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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