So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize