He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize