at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
