We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
