is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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