Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize