I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
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