i don't like sucking hair
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
