even my farts smell like vagina
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
