Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I feel like death gave me a hand job
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
