covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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