Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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