it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
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