I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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