we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
