U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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