At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
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