The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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