we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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